What To Do After The Mess Is Cleaned Up

There are some experiences that we don't choose to happen to us. After experiencing the death of a loved one, you want to take extra good care of your mental health; everyone grieves differently. Here are some tips to help you after experiencing a tragic loss.

Take things slowly

After experiencing the loss of a loved one, you must take some time to look after yourself and your mental and physical well-being. You should not feel pressured to rush back to work or school, or be tough on yourself when you find that you are not as productive as you used to be. You should be gentle with yourself, and ensure that you leave yourself time to do some of your favourite activities and hobbies. Giving yourself small targets to meet will also make tasks feel more manageable and are less likely to leave you feeling overwhelmed.

Look back on happy memories

Whilst it is very easy to feel heartbroken and focus on the fact that you have lost your loved one, you should try to instead focus on the happy memories you created with that person. This will become easier over time, but when you first lose your loved one, it is only natural to feel sad when you think of them. By gradually starting to focus on the good memories, you will soon drive those negative thoughts out of your mind.

Surround yourself with loved ones

During this difficult time, it is very easy to push other loved ones away and become a recluse. Whilst this may help you temporarily and give you space to think, being alone for too long during such an emotional time can become isolating very quickly. Family and friends will want to help you during this stressful time, and you may find that just having a quick catch-up with them over coffee will leave you feeling lighter. Family and friends can also help you restore a sense of normality to your life by making social plans with them, but do not feel the need to rush back into your social life; you can take your time.

Talk about your feelings

During the first few days after a loved one's death, you are usually so busy with arranging a funeral and a memorial that you do not find the time to just sit down with a trusted person and speak about how you are feeling. If you do not feel comfortable speaking to a friend or family member, you should consult a therapist, as just talking about how you feel may help you feel better. A therapist will also be able to help you deal with any post-trauma that you may be experiencing.

Do not focus on things you cannot change

It will not help your mental well-being to sit and focus on all of the things you cannot change. Instead, you should only focus on the things you can change, even if they do seem insignificant to you. Thinking about things you cannot change will only leave you feeling demoralised and upset. If you look instead at what you can change and then act on those thoughts, it will temporarily distract you from the sadness you may be feeling and give you the chance to feel productive again, even if all you are doing is going for a walk to clear your mind.